sense of humor needed!

The other day, my sister called me on the phone.
It seems like every time I get on the phone with her the show begins. I could barely hear her speak. All I could hear was her two kids whining, crying and carrying on like brats.
As I was about to scream, "how can you stand it!?"
She bellowed to me, "Oh my God! How can you stand all that racket!?!"
I thought to myself, "huh?!?"
"The birds! The birds! How can you stand all that noise!?!" She screeched.
As I turned looking over my shoulder, I saw two of my budgies, who I call appropriately enough,"the gangs of New York", on top of one of the cockatiel's cage provoking and teasing, "Linus," my male cockatiel. He was screaming at the top of his lungs for them to promptly move away. Meanwhile, my princess of wales parakeet ,"Louie", was all in a uproar over this protesting by honking loudly. "Louie's" honking provoked the other tiels to join in on the chorus.
I remember my sister saying to me some time ago that in order to survive kids you need a sense of humor.
The same goes for having and caring for animals.
It seems that every time I have company (which isn't very often) there mysteriously appears a "mystery poop" stuck on e.g. the kitchen cabinets, the living room wall, the couch or on your hand no matter how thoroughly you scour your home of detritus prior to the visitation. The poop just magically appears just in view of your company especially when you brag on how much a neat-nik you are.
When dealing with animals, your sense of humor ends up falling into the catagory of 'bathroom" humor.
Last Halloween, one of my dog walking clients was concerned that one of her dogs got into the Halloween candy by mistake. She asked me to keep an eye on "Riley" because she might have eaten some chocolate. Chocolate can be poisonous for dogs. So far, everything seemed normal during the walk She was as active as ever. When she stopped to do" her business" she dropped a fully intact still-in-the-wrapper milky way candy bar.
"Riley's" pal ,"KD", a little poodle, had this issue of eating anything that was within reach. One day the owner asked me if I seen a box of ear plugs on the counter. I didn't, but I saw a chewed up empty box on the floor. I took her for her usual walk not giving it much thought. When she stopped to 'do her business" I reached in my pocket for a handy "poop bag". My eyes almost bugged out of my head when she looked as if she was pooping out a giant pink nerf ball. Three more popped out.
It appeared that she indeed ate the ear plugs and they expanded 10 times their normal size when they finally made their way out. Not only did she eat the ear plugs but the plastic label as well which appropriately came out wrapped around a turd stating: "made in China".
My cousin had the same sort issues with her dogs swallowing all kinds of things. One incident involved a missing sock. You can probably guess where she found the missing sock.
Let's put it this way, at first she thought it was a tail.
My budgie "Whook' can talk. This little bird had a knack of saying things at the most appropriate (or inappropriate) times depending on how you looked at things. One day, we had a problem with the sewer backing up into the sink due to a branch clogging the lines. I immediately called the 'roto-rooter" guys to come and fix it. The house stunk to high heaven .When the "roto-rooter" guy came in the kitchen to explain to me what the problem was I could see "Whook" bobbing his head rearing to go.
As clear as a bell, Whook screamed out, "JESUS CHRIST! JESSSSUS CHRIIIST! YOU STINK! OH My GOD! You stink! STINK STINK STINK! YOOOU STINK!"
The guy whirled around to see who was insulting him and just saw "Whook" just sitting there.
"Whook" also seems to enjoy doing "teenage boy" things to his soft perch while singing and chatting merrily, "oh I'm a biscuit! Oh I'm a biscuuuit!" especially when I have company. It's embarrassing when my company asks me what the bird is doing.
I generally try to ignore it.
Oh yeah, never a dull moment with pets!

The three stooges, dunkin donuts and troll dolls...

The three stooges, dunkin donuts and troll dolls..

If I have to explain then you'll never understand....

The Wild pigeons of Salisbury beach part 3

I went for my usual run on the beach this morning greeted by the welcome committee of the "morning" pigeons.
It's funny. They recognize the car.
You can see them all turning their heads as the car is pulling into park. For those who found Alfred Hitchcock's movie "the Birds" a fright you might get freaked out by my pied piper effect I have on these pigeons. As I step out of the car you can see about 20 pigeons descend upon me. They all know I have a can of millet seed for them for breakfast.
"Craow Dum", "Brownie" and "Busta Move" were present along with a mix of other grey pigeons. "Galok" has been missing since the storm. Hopefully he is venturing off somewhere else. A new pigeon who I named, "Patches Kennedy', has appeared. "Patches" as you might have guessed is identified by a spattering of patches.
That storm had a huge effect on the shore line. I can see how much the sand and surf has receded at such a dramatic level. The surf side beach club which is posted right on the beach has lost about 7 feet of sand exposing pilings holding the deck and foundation up.
The old grandeous hotel, Ocean Echo, that burned down in the early 1900's has it's dock pilings exposed.The hull ribs of wreck of the Jennie M Carter that ran aground in 1894 is also now exposed. The treasure seekers with their metal detectors were busy like seagulls in search of finding any uncovered treats . A few years ago when we had the Patriot's day storm one treasure hunter found a coin dated from the mid 1800's.
I wondered where the pigeons find refuge during the storm. When the wind is blowing from the north they usually huddle on surf side roof facing south. I've seen Craow Dum hunkered down under the pizza sign on top of the fan cover tucked in a corner. He is pretty much protected from any weather conditions in this spot. I've looked around to see where they could possibly go. Dilapidated air conditioners hanging from some of the old abandoned shops as well as rotted gutters and busted light fixtures seem to provide homes for some of them.
At some point these old buildings will be taken down and replaced by condos and la de da shops. I wonder what will happen to the pigeons?

the Wild pigeons of Salisbury beach part 2

Everyday I go down to the beach and feed my group of pigeons even if when I feel too sick to go for a run.
They wait for me.
These pigeons do not have an easy life despite of residing at an area that has pizza, french fries and fried dough.
They face getting run over by cars, rocks thrown at them from nasty punks, treacherous weather, cats, hawks and discarded fishing equipment.
One day, I noticed a couple of the pigeons had monofiliment fishing line wrapped around their feet. It was the summertime, the fishermen line the beach shore early morning in pursuit of striper bass. Many of their lines and hooks get "lost" or discarded in the surf creating not only a hazard for people walking the beach barefoot but for the local wildlife. I've seen these lines wrapped around seagulls bodies as well as bits of lines hanging out of their mouths.
When I saw the pigeons with the lines wrapped around their feet I was hoping they could shake it off because they certainly wouldn't let me near them in order for me to remove it.
One pigeon in particular had a piece wrapped tightly around it's foot. The foot was infected and swollen. It looked like a baseball mitt. I called him "Big Foot". He managed to still come around despite his disability. He could barely walk never mind to perch. He hung around for about a year then disappeared.
Shortly later I saw "Craow Dum", my baby pigeon that I watched grow up with a piece wrapped around his foot. He was only a year old. I felt sorry for him. He later shook the line off but it caused permanent damage to his feet. There are pigeons that look similar to him but I identify him with his deformed feet. I still see him everyday.
I see hawks all the time. When the pigeons don't come down for their morning feast I can safely assume a hawk is nearby. I did see a sharp shin hawk perched on a coke machine with a hapless pigeon in it's grasp. It was unnerving. One day, "Whitey' the white pigeon, disappeared.
Certain pigeons come and go. When I don't see them in the morning I assume the worse. But then the next day they would all show up.
When I would go to the beach in the afternoon. I noticed a different group of pigeons identified by their markings. I call this group the "beach pizza pigeons". One of these afternoon 'beach pizza pigeons" is a distinct reddish brown pigeon. I would only see him when I took my bike down to the beach mid afternoon.
Word must have gotten out to some of these pigeons because I started to notice once in a while this brown pigeon would show up in the morning if I came a bit later in the morning to feed them. I named him, "Brownie".
If you really look at these birds you would appreciate how beautiful they are. Their necks are a purplish greenish iridescent color. They are amusing how they interact with one another.
"Busta Move", the pigeon who dances and flirts with the female pigeon, is a riot to watch.
He would bob his head, puff his chest out and spin around. He must think of himself as a major "player". If his dance moves failed to attract a female, he would be so bold as to just climb onto a reluctant female only to get pecked and pushed off. It must not be any different from what goes on at a singles bar.
Ahhhh, such is the life of a pigeon!

* photo credit: "Super Dove" by Courtney Humphries

the wild pigeons of Salisbury beach part 1

Before I start this post, I would like to recommend a couple of really good books relating to this subject. If you have even a marginal interest in pigeons, please check these books out.
"Pigeons: The fascinating saga of the world's most revered and reviled bird" by Andrew D. Bleckman
"Super Dove' by Courtney Humphries
"Extraordinary Pigeons" by Stephen Green-Armytage

Every morning I run on Salisbury beach. I pass a block of pizza shops, arcades and t-shirt shops. There in the tucked in recesses of these building lives a colony of pigeons. Some of the pizza shops are not happy with the pigeon hanging around and perching on their signs. They have installed long needle like spikes up there so the pigeons can't perch there. One pizza shop, however, has a perfect alcove for the pigeons to perch and nest.
One day I looked up and saw what looked to be a nest.The pigeons seem have been busying themselves back and forth up there early morning and at dusk. Everyday I would take a peek to see if there was any activity within the nest. Sure enough, two little heads poked up. I saw two other pigeons hunker down in the nest feeding the babies by taking turns.This went on for about 4 weeks. The babies looked almost full grown.
At this stage the babies are called "Squabs". They are very plump and almost ready to fledge. Englishmen and Frenchmen historically harvest and eat these squabs . They are considered a delicacy. This is the bird equivalent of veal. These are babies who have never even had their first flight. They are snatched from their parents and are used as food. I think this is horrible.
One baby in particular in this nest I noticed had a white head and body with a black stripe around his neck making him look like he had a beard. We called him "Craow Dum" (which means 'black beard" in Thai) After about 6-8 weeks he was fledged and full grown. He would take off with the other pigeons doing what pigeons do during the day and then come back at dusk to his little protective alcove.
There were other pigeons in the group that were also distinguishable. One had a grey body and a white head. The head had distinct black markings that made him look like a skeleton head. We called him "Galok" (which means "skeleton head")
There was another one that was all white so we just called him "Whitey Bulger". One pigeon who did not have any distinguishable markings. He was just a dark grey bird but his actions drew him a name. He would make a pest of himself with what I assume were female pigeons. He would puff his chest out, fan his tail out and twirl around in a circle in this hilarious looking dance.
We called him "Busta Move"
I started to feed them every morning. I made sure I got there at the crack of dawn to feed them when no one was around. Many people just do not like pigeons.
I personally find them interesting in their own pigeon world interaction and I find them very beautiful because of the diversity of color patterns. I've been watching this group of pigeons for about two years.
They live a rather harsh life and I am amazed at how resilient and determined in survival they are.
*more on them later

March 2nd

Today is my husband's 42nd birthday.
I met him when he was 30 years old and he is more handsome now than when I first met him.
(I convinced him to ditch the hair gel and his "nerd wear" (plaid shirts and corduroy pants- which have "mysteriously' disappeared) He still looks like a kid with his smooth skin and slim physique.
I can honestly say I can't say the same for myself.
I have definitely aged.
My skin is sagging and I seem to be sporting a slight dewlap. My waistline is definitely thicker. I wear bifocal glasses now along with having glaucoma and cataracts.
The migraine demons wear me out. They invade at anytime like some sort of evil secret police imprisoning me and torturing me for weeks on end. Just when I get a reprieve they attack again.
It is exhausting but you have to adjust your lifestyle in order to get by. My husband is very sympathetic to me when I have these attacks.
It is funny how when you start a relationship with someone but you never know where it will bring you.
One of the wonderful surprises in my relationship that has brought us closer together was having pets..
Yes, pets.
My husband never had pets as a kid so I didn't know how he would feel towards animals.
Yes, when we were first dating instead of bringing me flowers and candy we would bring bags of frozen vegetables for my iguanas. He didn't seem to mind them too much although he wouldn't use my bathroom when it was bath time for the iguanas.
We later got a parakeet. He completely fell in love with "Whook". We would practice ballroom dancing in the kitchen and Whook would sit proudly on his shoulder going for the dancing "ride".
Later, the bird population grew due to homeless birds in need of a good home. He wouldn't protest but instead would convince me that this poor little cockatiel needed a home!
Our perfect evening would consist of us watching TV with all of birds perched on us.
When we have my bird pet sitting "customers" staying with us he would insist they get "special treatment". He would let the birds all have a free for-all with millet treats and lots of out of cage attention.
He was pretty good with my dog customers as well. When I was having one of my many migraine attacks he would come with me to assist walking the dogs. Although he wouldn't pick up the poop (That is what I was getting paid for!) He would stroll happily with one of the many dogs.
Yup, it is funny where that path will lead you.
So far it has been 'happy trails"!

Tilikum

First of all, I want to express my condolences to the family of Dawn Brancheau who died accidently while working with SeaWorld's orca whale Tilikum. It is very sad indeed for both Dawn and for Tilikum. I think SeaWorld made the right decision to keep Tilikum but to work with him with a bit more caution.
My friends know how I have an affinity for all sea creatures. People have come up to me saying stupid things like,"whatta think about that killer whale that killed that girl, eh? I think they should kill him.
I stand there speechless.
I am sure Dawn would be mortified to hear this kind of talk about her beloved whale.
To be honest, I am surprised that this sort of occurrence doesn't happen more often.
Let's stop and think about it. Here these highly social sea hunters are enclosed in this man made pool. Their only social interaction is with other whales that they are stuck with and their trainers.
Sure, it is really cool to see this beautiful whales up close like this. I went to SeaWorld when I was about 15 years old. I loved seeing the whales and dolphins. The one think that stuck me on a negative level was how loud and annoying the music was. I thought to myself how can those whales stand listening to that crap day and night everyday?
My dear Aunt Marie passed away right after Thanksgiving. . I was a bit numb and emotionally fried still reeling over her death. I had to pick up a few things for Christmas at Walmart. The first thing that hit me when I walked into the store was the "music".
The overhead music was blasting so called Christmas music by Whitney Houston and then a rap Christmas song by Snoop Dog.
It was pure torture. I had to get out of there.
I thought I was going to go out of my mind. I don't know if I was just being overly sensitive at the time but I couldn't stand it and, I still can't stand it.
It wouldn't surprise me that the whales go bonkers out of boredom and having to listen to that music screaming at them.
In the book, "Notes from an Underwater Zoo" written by Don Reed published in 1981 talks about his experience as a oceanarium diver at San Francisco's marine World.
He shares funny and wonderfully stories about his relationships with marine animals but also not so nice stories about (former) abuse, attacks by marine mammals on their trainers as well as on other tank companions.
It appears to me humans are almost "autistic" in reading and 'getting" animals social cues about what they want or don''t want and what is socially acceptable to them. Many of the social cues are very subtle.
Chris Davis is a parrot trainer at Lion Country Safari. She write a monthly column in "Bird Talk" magazine on dealing with behavioral issues with companion parrots. Many of the people who write to her complain that "all of a sudden my parrot turned mean". She explains to the person that the parrot gave the owner many subtle clues about what they found unacceptable but the person just didn't "get it" so the parrot responds by biting.
What I find that is very interesting is how we are almost "autistic" in getting animals social cues however one of the most interesting and insightful book I've read on understanding animal behavior was written by a woman with autism. She could see things that most people ignored.
The book is "Animals in Translation" by Temple Grandin.
It is one of those must read books.
As the patron saint, I will say a prayer for people to take the time to learn and understand animals rather than forcing what we want on to them.