wilted sunflower

I had my cast removed but my foot still hurts like hell when I walk and it is still extremely swollen.
I just started physical therapy. I thought by now my foot would start to look normal. I must have torn muscles and ligaments.One lady saw me struggling to walk and asked if I had gout. She probably saw the one big leg and and the other normal sized leg. I look like a freak.
As instructed through physical therapy  to just walk "normally" and without a cane..I feel like an injured bird just waiting to get picked off by a hawk. I'm really trying to hide the injury.
.My neck and head constantly hurt. I've been eating zomigs every single day and I am running out of them.
The pharmacy always seems to run out of them and then forgets to reorder them.The insurance company will only pay for 18 of them at max per month.Nothing else takes the edge off.
The pain just will not fucking go away
Twice I felt so hopelessly shitty that I was ready to glug a entire bottle of whatever.
 I've had a migraine for two months solid. And yes, I've talked to the doctor about it and it appears nothing can be done.
I just started to get up at 2:00am before the headaches start and do yoga stretches. My long time pal suggested I do this. The pain starts from the back of my leg all the way up to the top of my head.
These stretches seem to be helpful.
I'm tired of complaining and I'm tired of feeling shitty. And I know people are sick of listening to me.
My birds are the only thing  that keeps me going....
I feel like I am just "waiting".
Waiting for the pain to go away

la nube negro (the black cloud)

Wow..these last two weeks have been really really tough. I can't seem to shake this nasty migraine. I feel engulfed by a big black cloud.
 I've been eating zomigs and naproxin like candy. Just when I feel a bit more 'normal'. "Surprise!I'm baaack!' the migraine is back.
 My head is on fire. I spend a lot of time with ice on my head and neck
So I decided to go back on valtrex hoping this is just a virus since now I have blisters down my throat.
Oh fun..
Hopefully this friday I'll have this cast off my foot. I'm not sure what will happen after the cast is removed. My foot still looks freaky, it has spasms and I feel something pulling. Walking with the cast is awkward. I walk like a weeble. I normally walk on my toes (ball of the foot) so walking in a rocking motion and lopsided as presented is exhausting. I'm able to get around, but much more slowly.Since my gait is off and I am slow I stay out of people's way especially in grocery stores so I don't get plowed down.
Some people are kind and some people are complete dicks.
 Two weekends ago, my husband took me to the beach in the morning. The lot was filling up really fast. One fisherman was pulling out of a coveted space near the benches. I got out of the car with my crutches to hold the spot so my husband could back in. A truck tore around the parking lot and told me to get out of way because "he was waiting for that space". Needless to say I was taken back. I proceeded to walk over to the bench. The same guy said that "he was there first".He wanted the bench so he could put is cooler on it so it wouldn't get sandy. I limped down the sand to find another spot. I could understand if this guy was elderly or had difficulty walking but that wasn't the case. It was some young selfish 30 something prick with his dog and girlfriend! Nice, eh?
Last weekend I stopped in Shaws to grab a few grocery items. I stay clear of people not to get in their way since everyone is in a big hurry. There were hardly any people in the store that afternoon. As I was walking out through  the automatic door I felt somebody out of the blue hurry up on my back heels and mumble,"fer chris sake.. I haven't got all day!" I turned around and this snotty woman pushed right by me almost knocking me over.
Wow....really..
Last friday, I noticed one of my cockatiel's "Eddie' was not feeling well. I thought, 'oh no..not you Eddie".  I was of course in a major panic. I called my vet but she had just left for vacation. Eddie was throwing up profusely and slumped at the bottom of cage. I started calling every possible avian vet I could think of. It was friday night and most vets had the weekend off or they were fully booked.I couldn't bear losing her.I found a vet in Gloucester where one of my pigeon chat line chatters goes to. The vet took me right away. Thank God my husband drove me over.Once I gave her a drop of baytril she perked right up.
She had a prescribed dose for ten days but I ran out of meds in two days.(!) The meds were dispensed in a tiny vial and I must of lost some in trying to fill the syringe. I am waiting to hear from the doctor now so I can get more meds.
It's lousy feeling sick and out of commission but I go completely off the deep end when its one of my birds that is sick..